Coffee and the apple in my eye

So this morning as I drank my coffee and chatted with God, I was talking about some things that are troubling me. I said that I know he has laid a path for me, but it is so difficult right now. I feel like path that Dorothy and her companions took to get to the Emerald City seems similar, especially where the nice fruit trees turn into beings that start throwing fruit at them. Yeah. That seems about right. When I told God this, he laughed and said how much he likes that movie. I looked at him and reminded him about the part when they got to the Emerald City and they found that the wizard was a man behind the curtain. He then looked at me and said, "So I guess you're having a bit of trouble with your faith right now, huh."

"Yes, in fact, I am. I'm angry too. I feel that my guides on this path are deceivers. I don't know who to trust. You led me here. I want to do your work. I thought that's why You brought me to this place. Now I don't know who to turn to. Everything is changing. I'm also scared. As we discussed yesterday, God, I have limits and this path is becoming painful and exhausting. I'm tired. I've been walking in faith, God, but am on faith reserves now. Actually, its more like fumes. I'm disappointed in those who were supposed to be my guides. We seem to be in agreement, then they change my words and their words, then I'm not so sure they were ever in agreement. These are the people I thought were supposed to shape me now. I'm exhausted from doing what I've been asked to do, and not even being met half way by these people. I'm frustrated having my the words of my intentions twisted around. I thought I was clear. I shared what I thought You put in my heart. Now I doubt everything," I ranted to God as he sipped his coffee.

God put his coffee down and said, "All earthly beings are imperfect. I made them that way so they can hopefully evolve--that includes you. Are those people really deceivers or are they dealing with their own imperfections? Are you looking for validation for the anointing I have already given you? You don't need their validation. You know the truth of your anointing and your work. Why do you look for validation of that? Are you letting others get in the way of doing that? Is not holding my hand in faith enough?"

Ok God, so You've given me a lot to think about. This is going to require a second cup of coffee. I will reflect on this and get back to you.

God got up, gave me a hug and said, "You know how to reach me." He put his earbuds in and started singing the song he put in my head and heart yesterday, but changed some of the words.

I made you
I made you who you are

I stopped him and said, "Hey God, the George Michaels-type voice isn't working for me here."

"Cool. I am, that I am and I am also the Oakland Interfaith Gospel Choir."

Then I heard the choir.

You are a conqueror
Your are victorious
You're can't be stopped
(Basses singing additional verse) Unless you want
You can't be stopped
(Basses singing additional verse) Unless you want
You're a believer
You're an achiever
Now don't be blocked
Now don't be blocked

Hey God! That's pretty cool!

Coffee prayer for today comes from Isaiah 41:10

So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. NIV